Life and Big Dreams

I'm really starting to suck at this blogging thing. I started with the intent of tracking my life so that I wouldn't have to remember so much later... That hasn't worked out very well. I think about things I want to write all the time, but never get around to actually sitting down and typing it.

Anyway, since my last entry, lots has happened. Liam is now 10 MONTHS OLD! WHOA! Where did the time go? A few quick stats:

He weighs 22lbs
He's approximately 28 inches long
He's wearing 18-24 month clothes
He has 2 teeth that he didn't get until about 3 weeks ago. We can no longer call him our "Toothless Wonder".
He's waving bye bye, clapping, cruising the furniture, beating up his brother, attempting to stand alone, and eating "real" food
Things he loves: HIS DADDY (apparently I equate to chopped liver, or something of the like), bath time (or anytime he can play in the water), stacking blocks and knocking them down, his bottles, his monkey lovey, drumming on everything and anything, watching Ryan.
Things he hates: getting out of the bath tub, diaper changes and anything else that requires him to sit still for any length of time.
He officially answers to "Blue" or "Blue Blues"

Liam is a whole different ball of fun than Ryan was. Liam doesn't sit still EVER. Always on the move getting into anything and everything he can. He puts a new meaning to baby proofing the house. Don't get me wrong, Ryan was a ball of energy too, but Liam just takes it to a whole new level.

As for Ryan, he's moved up to the Montessori 3-4 year old class at school. He's rapidly learning letter and number recognition and beginning to learn to write his letters as well. He's been able to recognize and spell his name for a long while now, but in order to land that scholarship we have in mind he needs to learn the other 22 letters of the alphabet. :)

Ryan has always been very independent and stubborn. He continues to amaze me with all the things he says and does. He associates everything, and I do mean everything. He can reason his way into anything he wants, which is so incredibly dangerous for my will power to be a strong, stand-firm mother.

It's so interesting to watch how Brett and my personalities and appearances come out in our children. Ryan is a spitting image and personality of me. Liam is just like Brett, looks and personality. It is just so amazing how together we created these 2 little men, they came from the same 2 people and are soooo different!

Ok, now onto my true #6. If I would have done what I said I was going to do, I would have been done by now. Nonetheless, here you go...

Truth #6: My lottery list...

I. AM. GOING. TO. WIN. ... one day. And when I do, these are the things I will do with my multi millions.

1. Purchase breasts. Yes friends, I will buy myself a new rack. I guess God left me out of the whole boob thing. Maybe he thought I didn't need them. Perhaps I would misuse them... or quite possibly he thought I wouldn't know what to do with them. Who knows.

2. Pay off debt. DUH! The responsible adult part of my brain has to type this. I would pay off all my debt. House, car, student loans, credit cards, etc. After it's paid off, I will NEVER have another credit card again. Unless it is for work... wait, I just won the lotto, what's work? (And yes, I would buy the boobs before I paid off my debt.)

3. Put $350K away for each of my boys for college. If they don't use it for school, they won't get it until their 30th birthdays. Maybe then they will be responsible enough not to blow it like I would.

4. Put another $250K in trust funds for each child. Again, they will not have access to it until their 30th birthday. They need to learn the meaning of work.

5. Purchase each set of parents a retirement home of their choice. I don't think I need to explain this one. They are our parents, enough said.

6. Built my dream house with all the bells and whistles, but not too over the top. I have a "dream house wish list" that I will go by. No crazy stuff like an elevator or a "packing room". But I would like granite countertops, stainless steal appliances, front load washer and dryer, a pool, a party deck, 5 bedrooms, walk-in closets, a massive master bath with jetted tub and double shower, a mud room large enough for my dogs to have their own space, a media room, play room, a golf simulator room, surround sound throughout the entire house, a laundry room large enough to fold my clothes and iron in, a big rocking chair front porch and a 4 car garage... oh, and I want it all on one level. I hate stairs.

7. A condo at the beach. I used to want a house, but that's too much to keep up. I want a simple place large enough for my family to grow into. I don't want to have to worry about keeping the house or yard up. I just want a place to go to and enjoy.

8. Toys. I group these into one, because I would appear to be too greedy if I didn't. :) The toys I would purchase for my family to enjoy: a boat, 2 jet skis, a motorcycle, a golf cart and a blow up obstacle course. You can never be too old for a huge blow up toy in your back yard.

9. Various donations: My home church would get a big pay day, the pet adoption agency we adopted Dakoda from would get another large chunk of change. Each of our family members would get a piece of our winnings as well.

10. Finally, I would invest the rest. I'd be an idiot not too. After all the crap I just bought, I'm going to have to invest something for my retirement. HA!

Mommies & truth #5

By now you know a few things about me. Among them, I'm a horrible blogger, I love my family and I speak my mind...sometimes too freely. With that said, I will not promise to improve the timeliness of my blogs and I will not stop speaking my mind because that makes me who I am, however, I will continue to profess my love for my family.
My mother is amazing. I'm not the only one who thinks this. Aside from all the folks who tell me she's fantabulous, my kids think she hung the moon. When I say, "let's go see Nonna," their faces light up. Even Liam, at such a young age, knows just how special she is. We have a special relationship. She loves me unconditionally, tells me I'm beautiful, listens when I'm upset, comes to my rescue, prays for me, likes spending time with me (most of the time) and even gives me a proverbial kick in the ass when I am in need of one. That's just a sampling of why she's awesome. My mothering habits stem largely from her. She has an astounding faith in God. Through my personal struggles with life, she has been there for every milestone, every tragedy with love in her heart, and for that I am forever grateful. If I can be half the mother to my boys as she has been to me, I'm doing pretty well.

Mama, I love you.

Truth #4
In keeping with the theme of mothers, I'd like to share that I have two angels rocking in the arms of Jesus and my loved ones that have gone before me. I have shared about one of them, but due to the lack of public acceptance of children out of wed lock, the other has slowly drifted into silence. We don't speak of it often and that causes guilt in my heart. Our second angel is no more worthy of my heart than our first. So, here I sit and tell you that I am the mother of 4, not 2.

Watching Ryan and Liam grow makes me wonder what the other two would be like at 5 and 3. I am comforted through the realization that God blessed me with them. They were tiny beings that taught me the true miracle of conception and life and to never take either one for granted.

Truth #4

Yeah, I've been slacking. I'm sorry, but life has a way of throwing multiple baseballs straight at your face all at one time.

Anyway, on to the 4th truth...

I HATE MOVING. Brett and I, my in-laws and a couple fabulous friends helped us move 5 miles down the road yesterday. We rented a 27' Uhaul thinking that it would be enough to move us in 1 trip. Think again my friends! How much is too much in regards, to toys for 2 little boys? The answer to that is a full 27' foot truck load. Yes, 27' of toys. TOYS! Toys that couldn't just go in a box. Swings, power wheels, basketball goals, Little People, tonka trucks, jumperoo, play mat, every "sports stick" known to man (golf clubs, lax sticks, etc.)... the list goes on. I'm in the process of rethinking birthdays and Christmas this year.

This move was brought on by the owner of the house we were renting putting it on the market.We had 1 day to move everything, clean and turn in the keys by 5pm yesterday. We made our deadline thankfully! If we didn't make our deadline we would have had to pay double rent and we didn't want to (and couldn't) do that. I wasn't in love with the house on Brook St. by any stretch of the imagination. We loved it when we saw it, but after we moved in, we quickly realized it didn't fit our family style. Kitchen too small, an upstairs bonus room we never use, too small bedrooms, crazy bathrooms, weird floorplan and a useless backyard.

So after 15 exhausting hours of heavy lifting we've moved all of our "junk" into a 4 bedroom, ranch with a 2 car garage, big kitchen, HUGE living room and 2 full bathrooms! It's the simple things that I used to take for granted that make me happy now. When we looked at the house on Brook St. 15 months ago we didn't notice that one of the bathrooms didn't have any power outlets. Do you know how difficult it is to dry your hair without an outlet to plug it in to? Little things like that make moving worth it.

I have "battle wounds" from our move, I'm a walking zombie today and getting ready for work and school this morning for the 4 of us was beyond challenging. However, we are moved and on the way to better living! :)

Cheers to boxes!

Truth #3

I'm annoyingly superstitious. Members of my family laugh at me. Here is my top 10 list:

1. Do not walk under a ladder. I once made Ryan walk in reverse back under a ladder after he had done it in an effort to cancel out the negative energy that he had just caused.
2. Do not split a pole if you're walking hand-in-hand with someone. Brett does this on purpose.
3. DON'T SPILL THE SALT! And yes, I will throw it over my left shoulder if you do. Brett also does this intentionally.
4. Do not cross the path of a black cat unless you "cross" him out. There are smeared crosses all over my windshield above the steering wheel in my jeep. Brett just shakes his head.
5. Do not see the bride before the wedding. Not only this, but also don't walk down the aisle to your soon-to-be husband prior to the actual day. I had a stand in during my rehearsal.
6. Fridays the 13th are bad. Hide! I used to really hide, but I can't do that anymore.
7. Always enter using the same door you used to exit.
8. Pennies - If you see a penny heads up, pick it up. If you see a penny tails up, flip it over and leave it alone. Yes, I do this regularly. Quick story: When we were painting Ryan's nursery before he was born I walked into his room and found a penny, heads up sitting in the dead center of the floor. I picked it up and put it over the door in his room. It never left until we moved.
9. It's bad luck to let a flag touch the ground. Not to mention disrespectful.
10. Dreaming of death means someone is pregnant. This normally holds true.

Yes friends, I'm odd. I'm not sure what has prompted my superstitions. My guess would be a number of events throughout my life. Eh, who knows. Don't abuse my weirdness! My anxiety level may go throw the roof! :)

Truth #2

I believe in love at first sight.

Cheesy, right? Well, not for me. I met Brett when he interviewed me for an internship at a golf course in June of 2004. I remember the entire experience, word for word, minute by minute, feeling by feeling, as if it were yesterday. I remember he was wearing black pants and a black & red striped polo. **I have the shirt in one of my memory boxes. He was THE. MOST. BEAUTIFUL. THING. I had ever seen. This uncontrollable feeling of 'I have to be with this man' came over me. As soon as I snapped back to reality I looked at his ring finger. Surely this gorgeous piece of God's work is married. NOPE! No ring! Ok, Ashleigh... game on! I sat down, participated in my interview as professionally as my melting heart would allow. At the end of it, I got up and shook his beautiful hand and left. I couldn't get in the car fast enough to call my Mama to give her the good news; I'm getting married! Well, not exactly, but I certainly found the man I was going to marry, whether he knew it or not. She laughed at me.

Fast forward to the next day: I get a phone call while I'm sitting in the lobby of my college gym. The conversation went like this:

B: "Hey, Ashleigh. This is Brett."
A: "Uh, who?"
B: "Brett. From Anderson Creek."
A: "Oh! Hey!" - ok, so not only do I now feel like a complete idiot, but I feel like a complete idiot while on the phone with my crush... as if I'm 13 again.
B: "So, can you start this weekend?"
A: "SURE!" (SCORE!)
B: "Ok, I'll see you at 6:30am"
A: "uhhhhhhhh... yeah, ok. 6:30"

That Saturday was a whirlwind. Trying to keep my mind on learning a point of sale system when I'd rather be learning all about this man who was teaching me was hard. It was like I stepped in a time machine and went back to middle school again. My palms were sweaty, my hands were shaky, I was clumsy. What was this feeling? Oh yeah........ L-O-V-E! I was in love. I was deeply, madly in love with this man whom I'd spent all of 2 hours with.

I got through the day, I went home and I thought about him. I went back to work on Sunday. My eye candy was there with me too. He made working weekends seem like a vacation. I was addicted. I was addicted to Brett.

Then he left. He left me and went to Mexico. Now, keep in mind at this point I had not given any inclination that I was interested in him. Ok, so interested might not be a strong enough word. He had no idea that I was obsessed with him.

Midway through his Mexican adventure, he texted me, "Do you miss me?" WHOA! I was beside myself.

He came home on a Sunday afternoon. We went out that Monday. He moved in with me 2 weeks later. We got married 2 years after that.

So see.... Love at first sight happens and it happened to me.

A new game - 30 truths

An old friend of mine (man that sounds awkward... like we're old or something) blogs and I follow it regularly. She recently did a blog entry series she named "30 truths." For 30 days she revealed a truth about herself. I thought it was awesome and I learned a lot about her that I didn't already know. So, I'd like to "steal" the idea from her and do my own 30 truths series. So, for the next 30 days, in addition to my regular updates and antics, I will be offering truths about myself. Many of you know that I have no "filter"... so as a precaution and disclaimer my truths are my opinions, of which everyone is entitled to their own, and it is not my intention to insult or offend anyone. Not to mention, this blog will one day be seen by my children. I will not put anything on here that I wouldn't want them knowing later. We all have our secrets, right? :)

With all that being said, my first truth will be "safe" and tame...


Truth #1: I love NC State

If I could go back to college, I'd go to State. Actually, I would not trade any of my college experiences for the world, but I would want all of them to take place in Wolfpack country.

I was born during the NC State vs. Duke football game. My papa and uncle were at that game. I'm assuming had my Deddy not been busy helping my Mama through her breathing, he would have been there too. Regardless, my Papa was the first of my extended family to hold me in the hospital. Several years ago, Papa gave me his ticket stub from that very game. He framed it and wrapped it up and gave it to me for my birthday.

Wolfpack football gives me the chills. The good kind of chills. It's a thrill that I could experience every minute of every day if it were possible. Football season is by far my most favorite time of the year. One day we will have season tickets of our own. And MAYBE one day, NCSU will have a decent basketball team. :)

Luckily I found a fellow State fanatic to marry. Our children are born and bread to be Pack fans. They have no choice in the matter. Some of my best memories have taken place at Carter Finley Stadium and I intend to continue the family tradition for our children. Maybe one day I'll be able to give my grandchild a ticket stub I used on his/her Birth day game.

*Cool side note - the t-shirt Liam is wearing above has been passed down to every child born into the Radford family since my brother was born. Same shirt, different babies! Papa would bring it to the hospitals when meeting each one of his grandchildren, with the exception of me.

Just pictures

Ryan helping Brett blow out his birthday candles.

Liam's 5 month pictures - why yes! He's wearing Christmas pjs in February... :)

Ryan and I made Valentines for his friends at school

More birthday for Brett!

Ryan, Liam and Aunt Tara!

Playing trucks with Grandpa

Liam loves bananas!

Liam & Dee Dee hanging out

Ready for the snow!